Standing

I saw this on LinkedIn today:

Check in our your Asian friends and let them know you care and that you stand with them.

Check in: Got it.

Let them know you care: Got it.

And that you stand with them: What does that mean, exactly?

Honestly, it somewhat smacks of "thoughts and prayers," a once-sincere remark that has been reduced to a meaningless platitude, not due to overuse, but out of a lack of the ability to put it into effective action. Now in the specific case of thoughts and prayers, the fact that I don't believe in deities is what undermines things. Praying does no good when there is no entity capable of responding to prayers. But even if I were a believer, is there enough evidence that any deity responds to make it worthwhile?

Of course, I get the point behind "thoughts and prayers:" it's meant to show someone that we care for them, in the lack of the ability to do anything more effective. Accordingly, I'm more in favor of asking people if there is anything that I can do for them, or, perhaps even better, simply offering something, like bringing a meal or sending a check. Honestly, now that I think about it, I should do the latter more often; it's likely easier on someone who simply accept or reject something that's offered, as opposed to having to think about what might make for a reasonable request when under stress.

But I think that a sincere "How can I help you?" is still better than simply telling someone that "you stand with them." If one actually has the opportunity to go and literally stand with someone, in a vigil, or a protest, or what have you, it makes sense to take it. That's actually doing something, rather than simply saying something.

If one has nothing of substance to offer, then one has nothing of substance to offer. Such is the way of things at times. I understand that it can be difficult to own up to that. But perhaps things would be better off if that shame were put aside. And things would be much better if people were more broadly willing to share what they do have to offer with one another. I understand why platitudes have become such a common currency. But I think that there are better things to offer. And I know, for my part, that I have to do a better job of cultivating the understanding that I have those things, so that I can move from generalized offers of assistance to more concrete statements.