Here I Am...

Clowns to the left of me:

A new matchmaking service is being developed for Americans “to find the ideal Canadian partner to save them from the unfathomable horror of a Trump presidency.” That’s according to the website for a company called Maple Match.
Does the US election make you want to flee to Canada? Try Maple Match.

Jokers to the right:

Steve Inskeep: What war do you mean?
Jimmy Arno: The war that's going to take place when Hillary Clinton's elected - if that happens.
Inskeep: What sort of a war would that be?
Dami Arno: Your patriots...
J. Arno: Your patriots are going to overthrow the government.
Divided States: Georgia Auto Mechanic Ties Racial Tensions To Obama